Parodies Refrained


When a friend demanded a complete version of my “Yoda Clone” lyrics back in 2019,
I replied that I’m a fan of Jorge Luis Borges — the magical-realist, postmodernist master known to reference and review books that didn’t actually exist.

Like many others throughout cyberspace, I enjoy creating images of merch for imaginary movies, etc. Just a snippet of and/or allusion to a work not fully realized can be as satisfying as, if not more satisfying than, making or reading/watching/hearing the entire work itself. Plus, I simply don’t have enough mental bandwidth and time, so my choice is usually to cobble together either a little bit or nothing.

The problem comes when I get a brainstorm and then let what I’ve sketched out sit
for a while expecting that I’ll bring it to fruition — lots of Top X lists and mashup ideas languish unfinished in virtual folders, some of whose inspirations have long since left the zeitgeist. Here are the choruses to a few songs that will probably, and perhaps to your relief, never go any further.

Chris Evans as Captain America in Endgame holding Thor's hammer in close-up

Thor’s hammer ooh na na
Cap was found worthy of Thor’s hammer ooh na na
We’re glad Doc Strange was a good planner na na na
Hulk’s integrated with Bruce Banner
And Cap swung Thor’s old hammer
Thor’s hammer ooh na na

Avengers: Endgame Overture
My apologies to Camila Cabello.

Long wide shot of Mark Hammill as Luke Skywalker in The Last Jedi sitting on cliff facing sunset

Darth Vader’s gonna Vade Vade Vade Vade Vade
Lightsabers gonna ’sabe ’sabe ’sabe ’sabe ’sabe
And then I’m just gonna fade fade fade fade fade in-
To the Force, to the Force, in- in- in-
To the Force, to the Force

Luke Skywalker’s Journey, Abridged
My apologies to Taylor Swift.

[Note: I had one more very brief set of lyrics here because threes but I’ve removed it for use elsewhere.]



Images from Avengers: Endgame © 2019 Marvel and from
Star Wars: Episode VIII — The Last Jedi © 2017 Lucasfilm.


Related: Grogu à Gogo Huston, We Have Amalgam Rhymey-Wimey

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